Forgiveness: A personal tale

Forgiveness is one of the big themes in the May 2008 issue of ec. You'll find it in the interview with singer Stephanie Smith who has had to continually offer forgiveness to her dad. We deal with false ideas about forgiveness in Mike Wakefield's article, "Myths of Forgiveness," and there's even a whole week of devotions devoted to the topic. So I guess you could say forgiveness was on our minds this month. Check out how it played out in real life in this post by Emily, ec's production editor:

So I (this is Emily, btw) have a confession. A friend of mine from my hometown got married a few weeks ago. She asked me to be an attendant at the wedding, so I knew I’d be doing a lot of greeting and talking. I was trying to think of all the people I might see, and for some reason, my mind settled on one girl who went to high school with me. An odd feeling settled over me, and I couldn’t remember exactly why I didn’t like “Natalie.” But I knew I was still holding some sort of grudge against her.

I was trying to sort through my feelings about the situation when the memory finally hit me of why we didn’t get along: Natalie had gossiped at school one day about an unmarried mutual friend of ours who was pregnant. When I told her that I was aware of the situation, she told the couple that I was spreading gossip about their pregnancy. I received a very angry phone call that night from the pregnant girl, and I’m still not sure that she was convinced of my innocence by the truth in my side of the story. Couple that with the fact that I considered Natalie annoying, and she was really on my bad side. And then she received some special treatment in a competition we both were in! At that point, I decided she wasn’t even worth talking to and avoided her.

Looking back, I realize that all of those situations were rather petty and really don’t matter any more. So I forgave her for those offenses, even though she probably wasn’t even aware of them.

At the wedding, I was stationed at the entrance to the reception, so I was able to greet every guest. I wasn’t the least surprised when Natalie and her fiancé walked up. (I think God likes to see how I’ll respond when actually given the opportunity to deal with something that He and I have been working out in my time with Him.) We spoke briefly for a moment, and then I told her she’d been on my mind recently. She looked perplexed and I could tell she wanted to ask why, but a line was forming behind her of guests waiting to walk in, so I just smiled and said with all sincerity, “It’s great to see you. Enjoy the reception!”

What about you? Are you holding any grudges from years (or maybe just days) ago? If so, you should try forgiving the person and letting God handle the situation. It was so freeing that I’m trying to see if I can remember any other grudges I might be holding so I can get rid of them too!
—Emily